The last few weeks have been so hectic with starting Big Girls Don’t Cry and all the work that this has involved. It has been a whirlwind of trade shows, meeting suppliers and setting up the website and using social media to promote the Big Girl message. We have had this passion for such a long time and it has felt so good to be actually doing it. It has been such a relief to be doing something just for us and to be working towards something we feel so strongly about.
The business has been a welcome distraction to my own ill health. I was diagnosed three months ago with a Prolactinoma, this a small benign tumour in the pituitary gland in my brain. It has meant my body has been all over the place and my hormones have decided to play tricks on me. Now this is being treated with medication and I am well on the mend but I have had lots of discussions with my GP and specialist and these all tend to come back to my weight. My weight has not played a part in the condition however my blood pressure is now elevated and I have low cortisol levels (this is basically the chemical that keeps you awake during the day) so I am tired and my body is working hard to just do the day to day things it needs to. So I have made the decision for my health that I need to get fit and lose some weight. So I have started a little exercise routine, nothing too strenuous at the moment, some weights and a few sit ups and planking and I will be increasing my walking. I have also joined slimming world. I want to feel healthy again and I want to make sure I am around for as long as possible for my kids.
I have set my goal at not a weight but a dress size. For me the number on the scales is not that important, it’s about how I feel and I have yo-yoed with my weight before and I know when I can comfortably get into a size 14 jeans I am body happy and feel healthy. I have never been a smaller size than a 12 and I have never wanted to be. Not that I have anything against any one that is however it’s just not me. I like my curves, I like the way my clothes fit while I am that dress size. I want to be fit and healthy and know my body has a fighting chance to get through any further ups and downs.
So I am in full on health mode, its making my head clearer and my body stronger. I have a long way to go but I know I can do it!!
I have also made huge leaps in my own body positivity. I wore a sleeveless dress to work today with no cardigan. I did it and I feel so proud.